Hamstring disagrees

My hamstring argued with me all morning during warmups. It did NOT want to loosen up for me and had a stubborn knot all the way up to getting in the blocks. On any other day I would have let wisdom talk me in to not racing. Today, however, was not just any other day.

I had a great response to the gun, a great drive phase, and then trouble began. As soon as I tucked those hips under and came out of my drive phase, my hamstring started to lock up. I dropped my knees and shortened my stride to let the quads work overtime, but it was too late, the damage had been done. I crossed the line in 11.3. Even though that's a slow race for me, it's not that bad for a decathlon.

I thought, "well I'm not limping yet, so I'm not done yet." I went on to long jump like a highschool girl. Three non-sprinting attempts in long jump and a score that was now hundreds of points below target, I (now limping) realized my day was probably done.

However, since you don't really use your hamstrings for the shot put, I thought, "what the hey, maybe I'll accidentally throw 55', get back on schedule, and my hamstring will loosen up." It didn't take long for that thought to prove false.

So here I sit, on injured reserved, watching a high jump competition I had hoped to p.r. in.

I was doing okay until I called my wife...

You know, most people are unwilling to believe for great things, and even fewer are willing to go out and work hard for them. When it comes down to it, they bail on their dreams or refuse to even let one formulate in their head due to fear of failure and fear of disappointment. I'm experiencing a pretty heavy dose of both right now as I sit here writing. So yeah, I'm fighting back some tears and flexing my throat to maintain composure. But there's this other emotion that is wanting to take over. It's a feeling of "peace that surpasses understanding", knowing that "all things work together for good for those who love God and are called according to His purposes."

So even though there are thoughts jumping into my head of "I can't believe I just wasted three years of busting my tail for nothing" there are also thoughts of "that was the most amazing experience of my life. I can't believe I got so close. I wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world."

I'm going to spend the next day and a half in Portland making sure those latter thoughts are the ones that stick.

Thank you guys SOOOO much for your involvement in this chapter of the journey. I am extremely humbled by your support. I know many of you are wondering, "so what are you going to do now?" For now I'm gonna enjoy a couple weeks of rest. After that, I'll probably keep working the Hollywood gigs while Sandy and I reset our vision for the future. I would guess it to involve San Diego and athletics. :)